Some Laws of Life
***********************

A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell and make you feel
happy to be on your way.

A truly wise man never plays leapfrog with a unicorn.

Always remember to pillage BEFORE you burn.

Clothes make the man.  Naked people have little or no influence on society.

Deja Moo:  The feeling that you've heard this bull before.

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

If they're OK, you're it.

If you are given a take-home test, you will forget where you live.

If you are given an open-book exam, you will forget your book.

It has recently been discovered that research causes cancer in rats.

It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning
to others.

Law of Probability Dispersal: Whatever it is that hits the fan will not be
evenly distributed.

Money can't buy happiness. But it sure makes misery easier to live with.

Nothing in the known universe travels faster than a bad check.

Paranoids are people, too; they have their own problems.  It's easy to
criticize, but if everybody hated you, you'd be paranoid, too.

Paul's Law: You can't fall off the floor.

Psychiatrists say that 1 of 4 people are mentally ill.  Check 3 friends.
If they're OK, you're it.

Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. "Yes" is the answer.

The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average
man can see better than he can think.

The trouble with doing something right the first time is that nobody
appreciates how difficult it was.

The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity.

Vital papers will demonstrate their vitality by moving from where you left
them to where you can't find them.

---------------------
 Q: "Why don't blind people go sky diving?"
 A: "Because it scares their dogs half to death.
          Paul Grimes, Age 9


My book on how to make money on the net is at
http://members.xoom.com/makemoneynow/mybk.htm.

Also look at http://members.xoom.com/makemoneynow/new.html.

To see this Easter day where I come from, be sure to read
http://www.hypermart.net/tomjohnson/Jesus.html.

til next time.

Tom